The latest wellness trend from Korea could boost your success
Pronounced ‘noon-chi’, nunchi is a Korean word relating to ‘the subtle art of gauging other people’s thoughts and feelings in order to build trust, harmony and connection,’ according to Euny Hong, the author of a new book called The Power of Nunchi: The Korean Secret to Happiness and Success (Hutchinson, £8.85, amazon.co.uk). It’s all about reading situations, using your intuition and oiling the wheels of social interaction. And, according to some, it can boost success, help you excel at work and harmonise home life. If you use nunchi, you’ll also become better at using your intuition and watching for tell-tale signs of whether someone is genuine or not. Those with quick nunchi are speedy judges of character.
For centuries it has been the guiding principle of Korean life, and it’s so crucial that parents begin teaching it to their children at a young age, and with as much importance as learning to cross the road.
Someone with ‘no nunchi’ would be that person we all know who behaves awkwardly no matter what the situation, and can’t pick up on social cues – maybe five minutes after you’ve told them you need to do the school run they’re still chewing your ear off, and ignoring your attempts to tie up the conversation. Or despite your hints that you really aren’t up for socialising today, continue to badger you to join in with their plans. Or, even that person who wears the fact that they speak their mind as a badge of honour, no matter who they offend or upset.
In Korea, quick nunchi is about never saying anything that will offend anyone, or make them feel uncomfortable. Do you feel like you ‘read’ people easily, and always know what to say? You probably already have instinctively good nunchi. For others, it can be a little trickier to pick up, but there are a few easy rules to follow when embracing this philosophy.
Firstly, actually listen to what is being said, or, even more nunchiesque, to what isn’t being said. People will often skirt around the truth rather than say it directly due to the polite rules of society, and so picking up on what is really going on is key.
Before walking into a room of people at a party for example, understand that just by entering it you will change the vibe somehow. If lots of people are there before you, enter neutrally and pay close attention to the body language of others and how they are interacting. It will quickly let you understand the mood.
Always practise good manners, but remember why the code of manners exists in the first place. They aren’t there to make you feel superior because you know them better than someone else, they are there to make everyone in the room feel comfortable by bringing calmness and stability. If you’re unsure, always watch what others are doing and follow suit.